Friday, November 28, 2008

Retailers To Consumers: "Buy or Else!"

Consumer Behavior/Retail Misbehavior
By Kevin McIntosh

With Black Friday here and having just experienced the largest single month drop in retail sales ever retailers are getting more desperate than ever.

U.S. Treasury Secretary, Henry Paulson, began to show some signs of stress at an emergency press conference this morning, screaming, "Somebody just freakin' buy something you stupid idiots!"

There is speculation that the U.S. will call on financial relief from the largest source of wealth known in the world–the Olson twins.

Meanwhile, General Motors CEO, G. Richard Wagoner Jr., is in line to call personal finance talk show host, Dave Ramsey, to see if Dave can tell him where he can get a moonlight gig delivering pizzas that will pay around $20 million a week.

Satire courtesy of:
Kevin McIntosh, The Ad Agency Survival Guide

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